Being a new dad is wonderful, but can be exhausting and confusing as well. Especially, when they are not used to “multitasking” and likely one- job-at-a-time kinds. But I am glad, even dads are involved in parenting in this era. It’s been proven that there is same spike of “oxytocin “levels in dads (love hormone — known for initial bonding of mom and baby) as mothers, when they hold and play with their newborns, so even they are built to nurture and not just the earner or provider or hapless sidekicks.
It all depends on how much dads are spending solo time with their kids in childhood or toddlerhood. My husband shared “the physical bonding started almost immediately when he paced the hospital hallways with our newborn. And in a month time, our little one used to asleep over his top, even if he wasn’t rocking or soothing him”. A lot of people found it adorable but why is it so unusual??Don’t we expect dads to change diapers or stay- at- home with kids alone? It just the matter, how both parents can together balance an array of competing, ever-shifting priorities from being caregivers to sharing duties related to home and kids.
So dear mommies, include your partner, asking his advice, giving him opportunities to be alone with your baby, and enjoying time together as a family can reduce tension and resentment, and ensure he is involved. The very best parents are those who work as a team.
And dear daddies, you too need a real bond with your little ones, don’t fly blind, even you have the power to nurture. The day may soon come when considering mom as primary parent will seem laughably quaint. Be there when your kids need, feel the surge of love when your little one would willingly crawl to you, read for them, don’t just be the convenient back up to moms. Its beneficial for your child when both parents are actively involved, they can have more parent time and stimulation. Two different personalities can inculcate different learnings in your child. Its not essential always to follow “older paradigm”.
There is still lingering mentality that dads should be working out whole day and often moms feel guilty about going back to work. For me, both of these ideologies should be well examined — if someone wants to go to work or stay at home, it shouldn’t matter their gender.
So, buckle up daddies, just follow you “fatherly instinct”, and you too can work wonders alone with your child!! Happy Father’s Day!!